This article was first published in the CMS North Middle School PTO Newsletter (Pawprints), August 2009.

Active Listening

What is active listening?

Have you ever heard of active listening?  Active listening is hearing with ACTION.   Many of us have often thought that listening is a passive activity.  Hearing is passive because we don’t have to do anything for sound waves to pass through the ear and transmit to the brain.  However, listening incorporates hearing with a higher level of engagement. 

How do you actively listen?

Active listening requires you to look the part: look at the speaker, make eye contact, match facial expressions, nod, etc.

Active listening requires you to act the part: match the tone and volume of the speaker’s voice, adjust the physical space between you and the speaker for the appropriateness of the situation, gesture appropriately, remove distractions, and provide feedback.

Most importantly, don’t think about what you plan to say as soon as you can get a word in. Focus on the many activities that occur during listening.

Try this

Active listening also includes the following behaviors.

1. Ask for clarification.
   • Did you say ____? 
   • Did I hear you correctly? 
   • What did this mean?

2. Give feedback in several ways.

·         Short verbal feedback

 Yeah, Uh huh, Sure, I understand

·         Non-verbal cues

nodding/shaking head, expressions on your face, gestures and posture

3. Paraphrase what was said.

I understand that you are feeling ______.

4. Listen carefully for what is NOT said and HOW things are said to find the full message the speaker is sending.

Until next time – find a way to show as well as tell your child, “I love you.”

My best,

Tess Haranda

CMS North – 6^th Language Arts

Personal life, career, executive coach

www.successwithtess.com